This month is getting away from me. Someone said to me last night, "October is always such a crazy month for you, isn't it?" And yes, it's true, bracketed on one end by clergy conference and the other end by Diocesan Convention, and usually with some other travel thrown in, either for work or church, October seems to be my peripatetic month.
I am supposed to be writing a sermon right now. It's "some" done. The groundwork is laid, the bones are there...but I'm sitting with the "so what" part. I've noticed since we have been doing Gospel Based Discipleship in conjunction with everything, that my sermons have unconsciously begun to fall into the pattern of ending with the last GBD question, "what is it are we being called to DO as a result of hearing this Gospel" or the so what question....so that's where I am right now. And its not that I don't have some thoughts. It's just putting some language on it, good language, fresh language. So I'm procrastinating. If I were home I'd clean closets or straighten drawers. At work...I blog! I've been enjoying this journey through Mark, Jesus' lessons on discipleship. I've been preaching about every other week, enough to feel like I have kind of a series going that I can hang together, one on the other. That's the good part...themes develop, things can repeat and build. The downside of course is that repetition can get to be simply that if it is not used creatively....so I'm trying to walk that line.
Speaking of repetition....it's raining again. Egads! Good news? It's not snow. But it's cold and gray and it's already starting to feel sort of endlessly that season. I'm thinking about doing gratitude posts in November again. I was at a couple workshops last week, one on the brain and one on forgiveness. They were as different as could be...the first all science and brain scans, the second very spiritual and holistic (my two "me's"), but they both pointed to some similar truths. We go where we point ourselves. Our thoughts are powerful things and they change us. The scan guy showed evidence that they actually physically do that! Just as much as the food we eat, the toxins we are exposed to, the amount of exercise we get....what we say to ourselves and others about our daily experiences affects the amount of blood that moves in our brains, which impacts how the synapses fire, the chemistry works and essentially how everything happens, including perhaps how long and certainly how well we live. The other workshop operationalized a way to "do forgiveness." I was the test subject for the afternoon's demo. I worked through an issue with my brother. I have needed to forgive him since 1992 for some pretty big stuff. Was it a miracle? Am I done? No, of course not! But, there is a little a chink of light that was not there before...and as some of us who were also at the other workshop said after the demo...."I bet there is more blood flow in Kate's brain right now!" So I'm thinking about gratitude posts in November. I do remember the last time....that wonderful month of NaBloPoMo on gratitude. I'm not thinking daily....necessarily....but maybe....who knows. I certainly have thirty things to be thankful for! And I need to write more and be more intentional about reflection in my life, as that has slipped a bit. It could happen.
But for today....it's back to that sermon for a half hour or so as the day begins and we will see if "so what?" takes shape.