The Fourth Sunday of Advent is five minutes old. I am sitting by tree light, the carols are playing on the radio. I am filled with such deep peace and joy and wonder at all this Advent season has held. So many changes and shifts. Letting go of fear, moving toward love...my goodness it sounds like Christmas, doesn't it?
I am so full of gratitude for the blessings in my life, for the love that surrounds me. I am particularly grateful at this Christmas time for the new blessing, the new growing love in my life that R is. As we lit the fourth Advent candle together tonight and he read the lesson, I could barely hold back the tears. I could never have imagined that I would encounter someone who would be a good fit to me in all the myriad ways that he is, and who would do so while being unassuming, funny and just generally likable.
I am also grateful for the grace and decency of XDO. We talked recently and ironed out some things that needed ironing and closed some things that needed closing. Given that I am clearly moving on, it was an important conversation, and I appreciated the generosity of spirit in which some things were said and offered that made it easier for me to do that with a lighter heart.
I am also really, really grateful for my friends who are walking this journey with me. There is just nothing like having good girl talk when you need it when you're dealing with all this relationship stuff....whether it's a "you go girl" or a cautionary reminder to "slow it down, sweetie, you're getting ahead of yourself again" I cannot be grateful enough for my wonderful friends.
So in these last few days before Christmas, I want to just take time to really bask in all these gifts that I have been given. So much more than anything that could ever come wrapped up in paper and ribbon, this really is Christmas, God incarnate, love here in my life in real present and tangible ways, every day of the year. Thanks be to God.