God Watching Day 29...early post

"Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now." Matthew 6:34a The Message

I seem to be having a very hard day today. It's only just past noon and I have been in tears twice and have been close to one of those panic things and we won't even talk about my stomach and it's opinion on the whole affair. I have no idea what's up. Yes I had to do some "stuff" that connected me back with the thing, make a phone call to get some information, leave a message for another person...but these are the folks who are supposedly my advocates, so it's not like there was any real scary stuff going on. I suppose it was just the stir factor. And yesterday I spent about forty minutes in the presence of someone who is directly related to this business. Staring across a table in a meeting in fact. It was hard. Very. So I am having worry thoughts and anxiousness, struggling hard not to go to the worst case lose it all scenarios that my brain wants to create. I'm trying to hold on to a phrase that I heard in a lovely song that I listened to in a CD that a friend gave me, "God is holding your life." I'm trying to just let that hold me, to remember that my wing is always there to run to, and that I am beloved and called by God and prayed for by the greatest group of friends anyone could hope for.